Servant in Training

The Blog of Travels ~

Dear Journey,
I have many things I want and need to ponder
But I will get to them as they come.
Because I didn’t come here to worry, I came to be free.
And I have to thank you for bringing me here,
enjoy..
with love, Taráz

"I have worked hard since my first job doing a paper route at 14
getting up before dawn, buying my own clothes because we
were poor and learning how to live frugally. I had many wonderful
opportunities and great work experiences with so many people
over the years.

I married and saw the height of my abilities but it all came
crashing down when that union failed. I felt like all this time and
energy was failed. I felt inadequate and my temporary solution
was to turn into a ball of joy and love, not worry about anything
and travel with my savings that was hard earned, find refuge,
give inspiration to everyone around, and in turn it healed me in
so many ways. I focused on developing my artistic nature; I
traveled to sacred places of my past and put all pains into
expressions of growth. This was April 08 and I basically became
a new age hippie, till about the end of summer 09.

I spent over a year and a few months waiting for reality to really
give something. It was such a time of profound learning, but the
free spirit lifestyle wasn’t working anymore and near the end of
this period I was broke, and tired after struggling to get by with
only a little wisdom and joy left to give. I had to really 'work' on
me again. A full and complete introspection."

going back a little,
to that time..

originally posted ~
"Eye of the Seeker"
8-20-08

We wake each day and wonder... Amidst the daily needs and outward projections, energies and emotions, I find that we really just want love to flow, for it to be strong, to be surrounded by it.

I sat at this moment to meditate on what was next. Who was next. I sat there and thought, once again, who am I ~

We must continue to search the inner work
that needs to be done during our travels.

A summer of travels ~
July- Sept - 08

journals - Aug 08

"I am still young at heart, still curious, still lost in wonderment, still growing spiritually, still in a great search, for many things..

To find what our inner self is searching for and finding the right way to connect soul to "home." Finding the right one for our heart, and the endless discoveries of our own selves which will either propel us forward or keep us behind.

I love to be in a place of growth because I have always
needed to see this and learn this process more than others would.

2003

You are trying to hold on to something that was.. something that you know IS there
you just wish that you could access it. I must ask, what are we becoming? My daily
prayer is of awareness. To be aware, be strong, to love and care for others,
to strive for excellence, to listen and live this life.

and live this life...

I wake up early tomorrow, a shuttle will pick me up before
dawn. I will ride the quiet roads. The dream will come back
to me once again. In the coming months I will wake up early
to watch for deer and meditate in the forest.."

I felt a presence in my heart. What was this..
How I am doing really, is there enough time.
Who will I share this all with…?

Where will I go next..."

Other days - July 08

::Meeting fellow travelers::

I believe in you. No one is telling you any other way to be.
Feel for what you have gained in your past and have trust and
faith in yourself. Love and look forward to what is positive
and brings prosperity, remembering the Light that touches
the eyes that see.

Poems - reflecting back - 09

"During long days the signs would reveal

Themselves in the many paths deep

In the forest of self.

And he would travel with his new companions

Commune of the things inside

The things that burn.

Round the fire many nights were spent,

awake and waiting for the turning of the moon

It was his secret language.

He could only speak to those who listened.

For it is in the openness of our minds and gentleness in our touch

that makes us, Mystic Travelers ..."

~ Tarazat